Breaking News: SCIRA Courses for the 2017 Worlds

APRIL FOOLS’ DAY – THIS IS A JOKE

April 1st 2017

In order to make sailing more fun and appealing for spectators and TV viewers, today the SCIRA Board approved a new and revolutionary format for the 2017 World Championship in La Coruna, Spain.

Here are the details:

…

Race 1: Yellow and Blue Makes Green
The fleet of 100 Snipes will be divided in two fleets (yellow and blue). Both fleets will start on the same starting line at the same time.

Yellow Fleet: Mark 1 will be an orange tetrahedron 0.5 nautical miles upwind.
Blue fleet: Mark 1 will be a yellow cylinder 0.5 nautical miles downwind.

Both fleets, after rounding mark 1, will finish by crossing the original starting line. The first 50 boats that successfully complete the course (without being sunk or forced to retire due to collisions) will be eligible to start race 2. The rest of the fleet will be burned.

Race 2: “Running Start”
All boats will be rigged and ready to go. Each crew will hold their boat at the dock, while each skipper takes position in runners’ starting blocks 100 meters away from the dock. At the starting gun, skippers run to their boats and jump onboard (“Le Mans style start” in car racing or “Antwerp De Wurste Race” in sailing). Crews push off the dock and the team sails a single lap windward leeward course right off the dock. The first 20 finishers will be eligible to start race 3. Any other finishers will be scored DNF without appeal, and then their boats will be towed into downtown La Coruna and turned into flower boxes.

Race 3: “Downwind Demo”
The top 20 boats race downwind to a finish line set approximately 300 meters away, sailing backwards. The top 10 finishers will be eligible to start race 4. The rest of the fleet will be filled with ice and used to keep the free spectator beer cold.

Race 4: “Sailing Under the Stars”
A night time race that will be a special crowd-pleaser race for those watching from the stands of the “Snipe Sailing Arena” in front of the host club. Floodlights will keep the field of play illuminated, and music and fireworks will provide additional distraction for both sailors and spectators.

All skippers and crews will walk down a catwalk to the dock, taking selfies, while being introduced by the Master of Ceremonies. The best selfie for each team will be emblazoned on their mainsail so spectators can keep track of who’s winning and losing.

The course will be a slalom that is repeated as many times as it takes for the local favorite to get ahead. 10 turbo fans close to each mark will create sudden and unpredictable gusts up to 30 knots. Target time for this race is 15 minutes, though additional laps may be added if the local favorite needs more laps to get ahead.

The top 5 finishers will be eligible to start the Ultimate Race.

Ultimate Race: Naumachia: like the Coliseum in the old Rome, the remaining five boats will fight a battle to the death in La Plaza de Toros of La Coruna, which will be filled with water. Skippers and crews may carry helmets, swords, bows, burning arrows, and the boats may be fitted with bow rams and armor plate. Team racing and secret alliances are permitted. The last boat alive at the end will be proclaimed World Champion.

While normally we welcome your feedback about course length and detail, in this case our minds are already made up. If you don’t like the new courses, don’t come to the 2017 Worlds.

Sincerely,
SCIRA Board