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Moruzzo, Friuli Venezia Giulia, Italy - Jamestown, Rhode Island, USA - April 1st, 2018

We hope you have enjoyed our April Fool's stories.

Pesce d'aprile! Poisson d'avril! Aprilvis!

(i.e. April's Fish)

Caros marinheiros da classe Snipe, não se preocupe: os artigos do passado eram uma piada. April Fools significa piada de abril. O primeiro de abril é o dia das piadas (Dia da mentira) em grande parte da Europa e América do Norte.

Please check back later this week for more news from around the Snipe world.

The Editors

(photo Max Ceschia)

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APRIL FOOLS' DAY - THIS IS A JOKE

Pori, April 1, 2018

The European Secretary Martin Bermudez de la Puente announces that the 2018 European Championships will take place over two weeks rather than one.

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APRIL FOOLS' DAY - THIS IS A JOKE

Always looking for an edge, two-time Snipe World Champion and Star World Champion, Augie Diaz, has announced that he will be training for the Pan-Am Games with Monique, the sailor formerly known as Peter Commette. "We're a little heavy right now, but with a year to go, his, I mean her, hormone treatments should result in the weight loss we need. In the meantime, I just want to support Monique in every way possible; that includes shielding him, I mean her, from one of the members of our Snipe Fleet 7 here who always is looking for his next conquest. I'm afraid that Monique is quite vulnerable as she (got it right that time!) explores her new identity. Also, I intend to file a grievance with U.S. Sailing; that second to Monique in the 1973 U.S. Youth Singlehanded Male Championships has always bothered me, and now we know that Monique should not have been allowed to race in the regatta."

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4D Sails Now in Production

Sunday, 01 April 2018 07:08

APRIL FOOLS' DAY - THIS IS A JOKE

World-class designer Sammy Sailmaker has announced an all-new product line that will be available during the summer of 2018: 4D sails. "3D is done," he said in a recent press release. "We've taken the latest concept of molding perfect sails and added a fourth dimension."

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Elections of Class Officers Rigged

Sunday, 01 April 2018 07:07

APRIL FOOLS' DAY - THIS IS A JOKE

From the New York Times

by Carol Cronin

A recent Facebook data breach has revealed that Pietro Fantoni's election as Commodore of SCIRA might not have been as unanimous as originally thought. Voters were manipulated by ads specifically targeted to appeal to their fashion sense. There was simply no one else who could compete with Pietro's well-pressed shorts and Italian team apparel.

As to who might be behind these ads, there is no concrete evidence but plenty of suspicion. "I think it goes to the very top of the food chain," Jerelyn Biehl says. "The Snipe Commdore is such an important player on the international stage, so who knows what government agency might be using this as a test platform for future election meddling?"

APRIL FOOLS' DAY - THIS IS A JOKE

An investigative reporter has discovered that Commodore of SCIRA Pietro Fantoni stayed at Mar-a-lago resort during his recent trip to Florida for the Snipe DonQ Regatta in Miami.

Former Commodore Gwyneth Crook was stunned when she was shown the receipts for Fantoni's stay, which he had billed back to the Snipe class through a series of blind international transactions. "He claims there was no collusion." she said, shaking her head, "but he can't argue with the paperwork."

Paradeda and Tinoco

Sunday, 01 April 2018 07:05

APRIL FOOLS' DAY - THIS IS A JOKE

As part of its continued efforts to increase public interest, the International Pan-American Games Committee has announced that the new mixed team Snipe Class will now be human and dog. Xande Paradeda immediately announced that he's chosen a Chihuahua as crew. He calls his new teammate “Tinoco,” because it’s more fun when he kicks it.

Meanwhile, Augie may have to re-think his plans with Monique—unless she decides to start identifying as a dog.

SpaceX - Tesla Snipe

Sunday, 01 April 2018 07:04

APRIL FOOLS' DAY - THIS IS A JOKE

This morning Elon Musk made history once again—this time by launching a Snipe into space.

It's a staggering image — the first boat ever in space — and so futuristic that the picture seems somehow unreal. In other words, it's the greatest boat ad of all time.

Spacesuit-clad "Star-Snipers" dummies hiked the boat flat during launch to keep it moving at seven miles per second toward the asteroid belt. The Space Snipe will cross the orbit of Mars sometime in July, swing past the orbit of Earth in August 2019, and repeat this roughly nine-month cosmic loop for thousands or even millions of years (to the horror of some scientists).

Note: This Snipe was launched before the new World Sailing Sustainability standards were enacted, so it will be grandfathered if it ever comes back to earth.

APRIL FOOLS' DAY - THIS IS A JOKE

Auckland, New Zealand, April 1, 2018

Our spies were able today to take this top secret photo, which reveals that the Kiwis are currently testing a giant Snipe with foils for the next America's Cup. Could this be their new secret weapon?

APRIL FOOLS' DAY - THIS IS A JOKE

After becoming the first International Sports Federation to be awarded the international sustainability standard ISO 20121, World Sailing has selected the Snipe class to test new compliance standards before enacting them across all classes. 

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